It seems impossible to think that the God of the universe would care about me, one small person that lives on this blue dot that hangs in a solar system encased in a galaxy that gets lost in the middle of a myriad of galaxies that make up our universe. Well, actually, His universe. How can one being keep track of the millions of people on this planet, aware of each person’s longings, joys, dreams, struggles, sins, and more. Our finite minds just can’t grasp it! I struggle to keep track of my bills, purse, to do list, friends, family and those I see around town. As he says in Princess Bride, “It’s inconceivable!”
I was moving into my first own apartment! I had lived with friends, rented a room from a kind lady, moved back home, but never had my own space. Friends owned a four apartment building and had an opening. I could afford the cute little one bedroom, right across the street from a previous apartment. (I did mention that I’ve moved 43 times in 58 years, didn’t I?) Anyway, back to the story!
I talked with Jack about my move in date and couldn’t wait to get settled. As I lay in bed that night, I started a mental list of what I would need to make it feel like home. Jack’s unit had all wood floors, so I put area rugs on the list. I would need a shower curtain and garbage can for the bathroom, some kind of unit to put my TV and stereo on, and a lamp for the front room.
Mind you, the only one I shared my list with was my Heavenly Father, no one else. The next day I talked to Jack again and he told me the current renter wanted to leave some things behind if it was okay with me. He was leaving a halogen lamp, entertainment unit, shower curtain with a matching garbage can and by the way, that was the only one of the four apartments that was completely carpeted.
I know, I know. That’s inconceivable! How could God know those little details and then provide, perfectly, every single thing I needed. But, the story goes on. Move in day came and we took the first load of boxes to the apartment. My friends went to reload the car while I started to unpack. It was winter, so I took off my coat and thought, “It would be fun to hang up my coat in my own little coat closet, but I don’t have any hangers unpacked. Maybe there’s a hook.” It’s inconceivable, I know, but there was one hanger. Just one. Waiting for my one coat. Hmmmm.
The previous renter and his girlfriend dropped by to pick up one last box or two. She said she was leaving a silverware holder for the drawer. They didn’t need it. I thanked her but thought to myself, I don’t need it either. I have one packed away that I’ll use. I’ll just take this one to the resale shop later. As I unpacked my silverware holder I realized that all the months in storage, through the heat and cold had caused it to warp and break. I DID need a silverware holder.
In the midst of unpacking the first boxes, my hands felt grimy and gritty. But, in my haste to pack, I had forgotten to bring any soap. In the bathroom, I flicked on the light, and there on the sink, was one tiny sliver of soap. Just for me. My amazing God, in His amazing ways, had provided everything I needed that day, down to a tiny sliver of soap! How great is His love for us that He would know our smallest needs and provide as only He can. Hi eye is on the sparrow, and I know He watches me!
Now, if He can provide for those fleeting little needs I had on moving day, do you think He could provide for my desire to be a wife to a wonderful man? Was I willing to trust Him to know exactly what I needed, and when, and to wait for Him to provide? Is it easy to wait? No. It wasn’t easy. I’ve shed many tears over many years, cried out to God to provide that special man, now. Please! But, He sees each tear I cry, He hears each groan, and feels each longing because He created me with all those desires and hopes. Could I wait a bit longer? Would I wait for Him to provide the man who would meet the needs I didn’t even know I had? Would God provide that one person just for me? Maybe that possibility was not so inconceivable!